Making Peep Jerky

No one really ever wants to eat peeps that are fresh out of the package.  Stale peeps are the only sane kind of peeps to be eating.

But, unfortunately, the company that makes peeps seems to think that they should be squishy.  This is not right.

I brought some peeps home from the store the other day and we were sad that we would have to wait at least a month before they became stale enough to eat.

So we popped them in the food dehydrator.

We thought that would speed the process up a little bit.

Fearing a gooey mess, we thought we should be sensible about this whole process.

So, we placed the dehydrator on the lowest setting.

An hour later, the offspring was sad that the peeps were not yet stale.

2 hours later the offspring was eager to see if the process had completed yet.

So she opened the dehydrator to check the squishiness of the peeps.

Sadly, she found that they were still too squishy.

5:56...three hours into the process...

The offspring feels that her hopes have been dashed too many times in this process.

Nevertheless, she pokes the peeps.

Dammit!

The chief food dehydrator operator is not exactly sure why they aren't done after three hours.

6:50 on Sunday evening...

Blood sugar levels are running low and the offspring is getting cranky.



In fact her behavior is quite erratic...but still no peep perfection.



"Why aren't they done YET?!??!?"

"3 more hours yo! Those suckas ain't done yet, child!" 

almost 3 hours later and very close to bedtime for the offspring...

She is afraid to look.

A squish test reveals...

"They aren't done yet!  I'm going to bed."

The next morning...

We think we have achieved staleness.



The offspring descends the stairs to roost her sleep with a hopefully stale peep 



A squish tests confirms...

STALE PEEP.

"It really wasn't a wonderful as you guys lead me to believe it was gonna be."